Do You Ask For CONSENT From Your Child?

If you’re a parent, do you ask for consent from your pre-teen child before hugging them, bathing them, or changing their clothes? Do you ask for consent from your younger sibling merely to hug them?

These questions might be baffling or even throw a person off-guard, but they have an immensely comprehensible answer. In India, 5 children are sexually abused every hour. Victims of these heinous crimes are rendered with nothing but persistent impressions of trauma, which has a tremendous chance of projecting itself in unhealthy or even self-destructive ways at times, in adulthood. Children possess an undeveloped, impressionable mind. Consequently, their trauma goes unprocessed and they end up internalizing those emotions. It is of utmost importance to equip children with the correct knowledge regarding the subject of Child Sexual Abuse (whether it’s about private body parts, consent, or safe and unsafe touch), these habits must be inculcated gradually in every child and adult’s life.

We expect fellow adults to respect our boundaries. But it is very easy to overlook a child’s boundaries or discomfort. When children are forced to, say, hug relatives or family against their will, it teaches them that their desire not to touch or be touched doesn’t matter. This unknowingly misguided habit might make it more difficult for them to say no when they are faced with an unsafe touch.

There is a myriad of ways in which we can educate children about consent. Asking a child before initiating physical contact not only helps them perceive the importance of their consent, it also accommodates a sense of authority they hold over their own body. This habit might come across as trivial but it plays a valuable role in normalizing consent, prevention of CSA, and creating a safe environment for children. Just like an adult, a child can rightfully resist physical contact even if its intentions are purely harmless.

Circling back to the questions that were initially asked, it’s high time we reflect on and incorporate this pertinent parenting or caregiving technique that prepares children for even the most unfortunate of situations.

The following article has been written by our Amol - Gurusha Khera

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